Zhangjiajie, Hunan: Labour Day Pains

We recently just celebrated the Labour Day holiday here in China and were fortunate enough to get a 5-day break! However, China has this weird system that you must work back days in order to get them off for the holiday, so we had to work the Sunday before and the Saturday after. It makes no sense, but I guess that’s where the Party’s hard-working nature comes from. They couldn’t possibly let you enjoy free time with your friends and family without making you have to work for it.

Anyway, Hannah and I went down south to Hunan province. Since I’ve been in China, I’ve wanted to take a trip to Zhangjiajie (been in China 4 years and still pronounce this wrong every time). Zhangjiajie is famous for its national parks, especially Wulingyuan Scenic Area which is where James Cameron filmed the 2009 film Avatar. I watched the movie back when I was at university and haven’t watched it since. That’s not to say it’s a bad movie, but it’s about American troops invading a foreign land in order to extract valuable resources, which sounds oddly familiar. 

Hannah booked our flights to depart on the Friday afternoon at 17:20 without asking me. This caused an issue as I was due to work until 16:30. I had to message the head of department in the morning and say I was “sick”, but I’d still come into work because I don’t want to let anyone down, however, I’d need to leave at precisely 14:00 as that’s when I’ll be feeling my worst. 

Zhangjiajie is a “small city” for China that has a population of about 1.5 million people. That’s a good understanding of the magnitude of China’s population as this small city has more people than Estonia’s and Iceland’s entire population combined. 

On our first morning in Zhangjiajie, we woke up early to beat the crowds and went to explore Tianmen Mountain. Its most famous point is Heaven’s Gate, which started as a cave before the rear collapsed now forming a hole in the mountain. It has 999 steps leading to the top which is known as the stairway to heaven. The rest of the park can be explored on an elevated walkway that slithers around the top of the cliff edges. Looking over the side makes your legs feel weak and your stomach sink and you look at the 200m drop. A perfect place for a murder I imagine as you can push your enemy over the fence and blame an accidental trip or unexpected wind. Something to bear in mind anyway.

Tianmen Mountain takes half a day to explore, so after lunch, we took a bus north to the Zhangjiajie National Forest Park to see the famous “Avatar Mountains”. We tried to beat the crowds on the Sunday morning, but there was no way of avoiding it. We queued for the Bailong Elevator, literally "hundred dragons sky lift", which is the largest outdoor elevator in the world at 326m high (which is quite a unique claim) and got pushed as people shoved past to get centimetres closer to the people in front. In that situation, you either act like a local or you just give up and go with the flow. I don’t have it in me to act like an inconsiderate Chinese tourist, so I just walked with the crowd shaking my head in disbelief every 15 seconds. We got in the lift and it rocketed us up to the top of the tall, slender mountains. The views were epic and once you could break free from the crowds it became enjoyable. 

The sun was shining, the views were spectacular, and around every corner was another rock formation that just took your breath away. It was incredible and the picture will never do it justice, you will just have to go yourself to understand the true beauty (but try to avoid public holidays).

The park is huge and spans 12,000 acres, which means that it’s possible to get away from the crowds. There are so many trails and walkways that are just free of people. It seemed that the Chinese tourists weren’t willing to explore these trails unless there was a guarantee of there being a souvenir shop to purchase some at. We spent the remainder of the day blissfully walking the trails and enjoying the delights that China has to offer. 

The next day was a bit of a reality check. Thunder and heavy downpours interrupted our much-needed sleep, and our plans of exploring were dashed. We stayed at the hotel relaxing in the morning and watched Father of the Bride in bed. We thought that it would have been a waste of a day not to explore a little even if it meant that we got wet. We suited up in some dashing raincoats and rain boots and set off. What we discovered was that once we got the cable car up the mountain, we were in the clouds and above the rain. We could enjoy the fresh air but the visibility was hampered somewhat. We got lucky on occasion as the clouds and mist parted to reveal the emerging mountain stacks.

As we continued to explore the clouds lifted and we got to enjoy the mist-covered mountains. It was another spectacular sight that we were lucky to enjoy. Fortune favours the brave. 

On the final day trailing the park, we headed for the only part we hadn’t explored -  the Gold Whip Stream. It was part of the park that offered a different perspective of the mountains. We walked along the peaceful stream and marvelled at the enormity of the mountains around us. 

It’s a truly magical place that you should visit if given the opportunity (I know it’s not so easy now in a COVID world). Along with Guilin, it’s one of the most beautiful places I have visited in China, if not the world (even with the pushy locals). I didn’t see any Avatar aliens while I was there, but you might get luckier on your visit. 

Qinhuangdao, Hebei: The Old Dragon's Head

I’m getting through my bucket list of China in recent weeks! This time, Hannah and I were off to Qinhuangdao, which is about 300km from Beijing, or about 2 hours on the train. We left late on Friday after work and as soon as I got to the train station, I realised that I’d left my passport at home. It clearly isn’t ingrained in my mind that I need my passport when I travel in China as the government likes to keep track of your whereabouts at all times. That’s a totalitarian government for you! Anyway, I just had about enough time to Usain Bolt it to my apartment and make it back before the train departed. 

Qinhuangdao is relatively unknown but is situated in Hebei province and is pretty much only known for being the eastern starting location of The Great Wall of China. When Hannah asked what I wanted to do here but was surprised when I said that I wanted to go to the “Old Dragon’s Head” (the nickname for the end of the wall). “Why didn’t you tell me in advance?” she exclaimed. I thought she was taking the piss considering there’s pretty much fuck all else on the area’s Trip Advisor. 

We had to take a 20-minute train from Qinhuangdao to Shanhaiguan. We walked around the old town and looked at the exhibitions, which were far from exciting. One was a traditional Hebei home. It was bleak, dusty, and full of old shit. There are enough houses like that in Beijing that people still live in today, I don’t need to see it. 

We walked down to Lao Long Tou/Old Dragon’s Head and were blessed with blue skies. Karl Pilkington visited this part of the Wall when he filmed An Idiot Abroad. He wasn’t impressed, however it took him days, maybe even hours, to realise how dreadful China is. Why has it taken me so long? To be fair, this was one of the nicer weekends. We meandered down the beach and enjoyed the peace and quiet. Beijing is a beast of a city that one must escape from as often as they can and hopefully on a permanent basis. 

The First Pass Under Heaven is the gate which allowed access to the walled city.

It was time for lunch and Hannah was delighted to be at a coastal town with all the crustaceous delights on offer. The Chinese will eat anything that moves, and I’ve seen the weird shit they eat that inhabits the land so I can only imagine what freakishly bizarre foods they’d gobble down that they pull out of the sea. Hannah was delighted that she didn’t have to share while I ate some plan rice. 

We slept in late on Sunday and just enjoyed a day at the beach. There really isn’t much to this town, but it does have a pleasant beach. Although, I imagine it’s rammed in the summer and loses a lot of its charm. 

What is weird about this place is that there is a Russian town. The Russians flock here in the summer and the town is adorned with Russian architecture, restaurants, and even has a knock-off version of Saint Basil’s Cathedral (it is China after all!) I now had a choice between the weird Chinese seafood and borscht, I think I went hungry that afternoon. 

Despite it being a very quiet weekend with little to see and do, I had a thoroughly good time. The fact that we could relax and just walk along the beach on a peaceful, pollution-free day was enough. It made me forget about Beijing, work, university deadlines and gave me time to unwind. 

Chengdu, Sichuan: Peppercorns, Poetry, and Pandas

Chengdu is a city in Sichuan province in southern China. It’s known for spicy food and the home of that cute bear that’s famous in China, not Winnie the Pooh but pandas. As a lover of spicy food, I was eager to find the spiciest dishes on the offer and if we got some time to see some pandas, we could squeeze it in on the agenda between meals.

We awoke on Saturday morning to blue skies ready for the first of many fiery meals. Hannah found a local place and we ordered duck, noodles, a tofu dish, and dumplings – none of which were spicy. I wasn’t going to display my displeasure to her as we’d only just commenced our fun weekend away, but I was absolutely fuming inside. 

We strolled around town and if I didn’t know about the panda hype before, it wouldn’t have taken Sherlock-esque detective skills to work it out. Pandas are a symbol of China, but despite living here for 4 years I had only seen them in recent weeks at the Beijing Zoo - the unhappiest place in the world. The day we went to the zoo, the pollution was horrendous, the enclosures were tiny and filthy, and the animals looked depressed. If I were to see pandas this weekend it was only under the proviso that they were treated well. 

We headed to the People’s Park where Hannah promised me that it was the spot to get your ears cleaned in Chengdu. I wasn’t totally sold as I don’t usually seek medical cleanings in a park. As you well know, I’m a people so I agreed to it. We paid the 30 RMB (about 3 quid) fee and sat down to let the “professional” at our orifices. The measly sum of 30 RMB lets you know that the highest standards of hygiene and know-how are on offer. The procedure was over in about 2 minutes and consisted of him tickling the inside of your ear with some feather-like apparatus with the climax of him rattling a piano tuner for an odd vibrational feeling which I’m sure isn’t recommended by actual professionals. 3 quid down and ear infection imminent.

After this cleaning, we headed to the former residence of Chinese poet Du Fu, who the BBC dubbed him “China’s Shakespeare”. He is famous for his poems which were inspired during the An Lushan rebellion. The rebellious Yan dynasty tried to overthrow the Tang dynasty in a battle lasting over 7 years. He escaped the fighting and moved to Chengdu in 759 AD. He wrote the poem (below) in 760 titled A Guest Arrives, his first in Chengdu.

客至（喜崔明府相过）A Guest Arrives

舍南舍北皆春水

但见群鸥日日来

花径不曾缘客扫

蓬门今始为君开

盘餐市远无兼味

樽酒家贫只旧醅

肯与邻翁相对饮

隔篱呼取尽馀杯

South of my hut, north of my hut, all is spring water,

A flock of gulls is all I see come each day.

The floral path has never been swept for a guest,

Today for the first time the rough gate opens for the gentleman.

Far from the market, my food has little taste,

My poor home can offer only stale and cloudy wine.

Consent to have a drink with my elderly neighbour,

At the fence I'll call him, then we'll finish it off.

While the rest of the country is fighting a rebellion, the “great” Du Fu is getting pissed. If he’d picked up a sword instead of the bottle, I’d have a little more respect for him. Overrated. 

It was eventually time to fest on the famous Sichuan hot pot. For years, people have told me about the mouth-numbing, tongue-smoldering, lip-burning hot pot in this part of the world and it was time to try. I was a little cautious, but very excited to dip my meat, so to speak. The table was adorned with a variety of meat and vegetables. Hannah had to bring me back to a Chinese reality by ordering some weird dishes. She ordered duck throats or cow stomach or something equally weird, what’s wrong with a normal cut of beef? To be fair, she had the courtesy of putting the odd meat in last so that it didn’t taint the rest of the food. 

The oil simmered away cooking everything in a wondering mix of chilies, spices, and peppercorns. The food was cooked, and I took my first bite. As I chewed the delicious, scalding meat my mouth filled with ecstasy. Flavourful, hot, and peppery, I had gone to a fiery heaven. I continued to fill my belly with potatoes, cabbage, mushrooms, beef, pork boiled in the oily broth. My sinuses felt the effects of the spice (and other parts of my anatomy the following day) but it was all worth it. My nose was running, and my eyes filled with tears of joy. What a delicious ending to the day. 

Our plan for Sunday was to visit the Leshan Giant Buddha, located about an hour away from Chengdu by train. When we arrived at the scenic area, we laid our eyes on the queue just to get into the park. I don’t know what the queues are normally like, but on this Qingming long weekend, they were enormous. Hannah wasn’t having any of it and spoke to one of the rickshaw cyclists. He told us that if we entered via the east gate, we could skip this enormous queue. He said he’d take us there in his rickshaw. The journey was mostly uphill, and I felt bad especially as he was about 90 years old, and I’d eaten a lot of hot pot the night before. 

By entering via the east gate, we got to visit the Hanya Tomb which houses many Buddhist statues. It was pleasant to pass through the spacious gardens and see the weird and wonderful effigies of Buddhist Gods, but easily the best thing about the Hanya Tomb is the ability to skip the queues into the scenic area. 

We made our way to the giant Buddha but the next queue was unavoidable. 2 hours we had to wait in the tightly packed line. I managed to pass the time with some Football Manager, which displeased Hannah. I suppose she’ll just never understand the joys of leading an underdog Fenerbahçe team to the Champions League semi-final with a squad of free transfers that defeated Manchester City and Atletico Madrid in the knockout rounds. 

You weave through the final moments of the queue through the rock and down steep steps which hang over the Min River below. I even put FM away as the steps were unnervingly daunting. 

For all the waiting, the statue was mightily impressive! You stand at the feet of the statue and it’s hard to believe how monumentally magnificent it is. Neither Hannah nor I are religious, but I asked Hannah to pray to Buddha on my behalf as whenever I have visited religious monuments in the past my prayers go unanswered. I think my lack of faith diverts my prayers to the God’s spam folder. I asked Hannah to pray for Arsenal to return to their former greatness, but the look on her face knew it was too much to ask, so I asked her to pray for fewer errors leading to goals because my mental health can’t take it anymore. 

It was worth the journey to see, but my advice is not to go on a bank holiday.

On our final day in Chengdu, we went to the Chengdu Research Base of Giant Panda Breeding, which doesn’t roll of the tongue so easily. My original qualms were dismissed when I saw the facilities of the panda center. These pandas were living it up in a haven. They are protected, they have been removed from any potential predators and have copious amounts of food brought to them. They even have the zookeepers bring them a mate! They don’t have to worry about dating, they have free bed and board, and the more they eat the fatter they get, and who doesn’t love a big, chubby, cuddly panda? They have a perfect life!

The only downside was that it got me thinking about the tough lives of the pandas up in Beijing. It’s like they’re doing a prison sentence or military service for a few years before they can be freed in Chengdu. It made me question why I live in Beijing. The pandas are forced to live in that zoo, but I willingly made the decision to live in the same polluted environment.