Xi'an: The Eternal Emperor

Having only just returned from a trip to Shanghai with Drew I was hardly match fit for my next trip to China’s ancient city of Xi’an. It was once the beginning of the Silk Road, on which they traded with Europeans, and also the former capital of China where the emperors used to live, but it’s probably most famous for The Terracotta Warriors. I had planned to do a little more research before going on this trip, but you know who actually wants to read something that isn’t the sports pages?

Day 1: My first full day in Xi’an and I was up early with a carpe diem mind set. First, I headed for Shuyuanmen, a street known for all things artistic from paintings to displays of calligraphy. Shop after shop of calligraphy brushes, they were mildly interesting, but I had a biro in my bag and I was getting hungry. I was starting to get annoyed by the layout of Xi’an. I turned off Calligraphy Street onto Picture Frame Road then turned again onto Florist Alley. It seemed every road had its speciality without a restaurant in sight. I walked and walked and finally came across a Biang Biang shop. 

A type of noodle that gets its name from the sound of whacking the stretched noodles against the counter. It also seems to have the most intricate of all Chinese characters. With some noodles and fire in my belly, I was off again.

My next stop was at the bell and drum towers. I’d already seen the bell and drum towers in Beijing and I suspected them to be pretty much the same. Climb lots of stairs to see some fellas banging on a drum. No need to pay £4 to see that. 

Selfie-sticks are degrading

At the rear of the towers is the Muslim quarter. In this region are so many street food vendors selling an array of delicious treats. There was a plethora of food that I couldn’t identify, but everything looked and smelled incredible. It’s a good thing my grandmother cannot operate a computer as she’d be disgusted to find out that I was in an Islamic neighbourhood, eating Islamic food, cooked by Muslims. Nothing pleases her more than for her to hear that I’m eating boiled meat and potatoes, but that’s not too appealing when I’m gorging on middle eastern-Chinese fusion foods. Soon after it began raining heavily (my grandmother would note that as an act of God), I thought it would be the perfect time to check out the Shaanxi History Museum. Xi’an boasts over 5,000 years of history (and don’t the Chinese like to remind you of it!) but when I looked at the finer details of the museum I discovered the museum is closed on Mondays and that particular day was a Monday. I retired back to my hostel waiting for the clouds to part. 

Eating meat that belonged to that carcass.

I read a few chapters of my book, drank a beer, and took a nap and it was magnificent. 

The rain eased and I was back out this time doing a lap of the city walls starting at the Gareth Southgate. I got on a bike and began the 13.7km loop. You know what, it wasn't that smooth. Some of it was renovated and made for easy riding other parts were like cycling down some cobbled streets. There’s a reason why you never saw Hayley Cropper cycling down Coronation Street, it’s because her plums would have fallen out of her basket. With my bones rattled I headed for the Big Goose Pagoda for the largest water fountain show on earth. 

I waited and waited, and then it started raining. Some security guards came along with their loud whistles to move the people from standing on the small walls surrounding the fountains. The guards walked up and down continuously telling people to get off the walls only for the crowds to resume their positions 30 seconds later. I wanted to tell the guards "look, these are Chinese people. They don't care. They will stand where they want". The crowd got bigger and rowdier, people started pushing, the rain got heavier the whistles got louder and I thought this can’t be worth it. Without seeing the show I went back to the hostel and watched it on YouTube. It's called the biggest water show on earth, but I think the recent floods in Houston dispel that claim. With no regrets, I made the right decision to leave.

Day 2: Up early and off to Emperor Qin’s Terracotta Army. 

The tour guide showed us around and gave us a briefing about each of the archaeological pits and the discovery of the site in 1974. Local farmers were looking for water when they found pieces of clay and a fully in-tact warrior statue at the burial site. 

A brief history of Emperor Qin goes as such; he unified the 7 kingdoms of China, he standardised units of weights, currency, and built a road system throughout China. He is a very respected figure, but despite his greatness he sought everlasting life. He had the bright idea to take mercury as a way of prolonging his life, instead that polished him off early so the king's slaves excavated a site and built a clay army to protect the emperor in the afterlife. Standing almost 2 metres tall and each statue uniquely built with different styles of shoes, armour and hairstyles to represent rank. 

Top centre: You can see some red paint remains on the body armour which has somehow lasted over 2,000 years

I think that's what she said anyway. We had a small tour group but she still spoke through a PA system. Technology has advanced in China with them at the forefront of so many devices, but not the PA system. This tiny box which spilled out her voice incoherently was of no use. I got the gist of what she was saying. 

They are quite magnificent. The burial site was 5 metres deep and enclosed with a roof, but over the years the roof collapsed and this damaged the Warriors. Now, archaeologists have the tedious task of constructing the world's largest jigsaw puzzle. It takes 3-4 months to assemble one statue. They estimate that there are about 8,000 statues. Since the discovery in 1974, they have assembled 2,000 and require another 50 years to assemble the remaining ones.

Each statue is a replica of the slave who made it, and once completed they'd be slaughtered and thrown in a mass grave to keep the secrecy of the emperor's resting place. I know if I was one of those slaves I'd be taking my time making my statue, breaking bits off and starting again.

The Emperor’s Tomb has been discovered but they have no plans to unearth it as it’s said that the tomb is laden with booby traps. While Qin Shi Huang never discovered the Elixer of Life, his legacy will live on forever.

All told the trip to Xi’an was alright. The Terracotta Warriors were very impressive as was the food in the Muslim quarter.  If you’re planning a trip to Xi’an make sure you don’t go on a Monday.

Disaster and Chaos are Always Good

I had another friendly face pay me a visit recently, this time it was from American shores. Drew, a friend who I met from my days playing football in Korea. We were both drawn to the lure of DAROK with promises of free beer and nachos from our sponsored pub and that perfectly sums up our friendship. 

Our weeklong jaunt got off to valiant start. We awoke on Drew’s first full day in Beijing to blue skies and sunshine – the perfect setting for a trip to The Great Wall. We leisurely took the cable car up the mountain and spent the afternoon exploring a relatively empty wall (well, empty for China) before getting a toboggan down the mountain. Having seen the Wall before the toboggan was easily the best part of the day. We were back in the city by the early afternoon with plenty of time do a bar crawl through Beijing.

I’ve shared many tequilas with Drew in the few years I’ve known him and pretty much each time has ended in some regrettable situations. That night in Beijing was no different.

I made the mistake of telling Drew that alcohol is free to foreigners in Beijing nightclubs. Yes, free of charge with unlimited access. We worked our magic on the girl at the door of the club and we were in for free because of our charm, but mostly because of the colour of our skin. As we arrived at the foreigner table and two seats became available in the booth, it was almost as if they were reserved for us. We sat kings of the foreigners as we helped ourselves to the bottles of vodka, gin, rum, whiskey, and that devil juice, tequila. It was around this point that things got a bit hazy and I awoke the following morning with no sign of Drew and vomit on my shoes.

Where was he? Was he alive? Was that my vomit? I couldn’t contact him as he was still on his US carrier and that’s assuming he still had his phone. It was well into the afternoon and there was no word. I was feeling pretty awful at that stage as since I had met him at the airport I’d taken care of the travel arrangements and then left him in a city. As I was heading out into the heart of Beijing to look for him there he was. He’d found my apartment…somehow. He was looking worse for wear, but with litres of Gatorade under his arm he was there and alive with possessions intact. Relief.

I asked him what had happened and where he had been, but he was as useful as I was at filling in the blanks. The day of sightseeing was cancelled and the recovery began.

"One of the worst hangovers in years" was how Drew described it. I had to inform the young man that despite the alcohol being offered for free, it was, in fact, fake alcohol. Fake alcohol as in some Chinese fella has brewed it in his bathtub and packaged it to look like the real thing. It’s China, everything’s fake. It probably doesn’t bode well that my body has become immune to the stuff, although I remember how horrific those hangovers were when I first arrived here.

We still had an opportunity to make up for lost time as our train to Shanghai wasn’t until 2pm the following day, so we set an early alarm and made plans to see Tiananmen Square, The Forbidden City and The Temple of Heaven before our departure to Shanghai.

There was a slight drizzle come the morning, but we were more determined than ever. We turned to Chairman Mao Zedong for inspiration.

“Once all struggle is grasped, miracles are possible”.

- Mao Zedong

With this Marxist-Leninist-Maoist inspiration in our hearts, we were on our way to do some communist sightseeing. 

We walked around the sights getting wetter and colder. Despite the weather, we still had to fight our way through the crowds (it’s China, there are always crowds). Chinese crowds are trying at the best of times and one thing that makes them worse – umbrellas. Those pointy umbrellas scratched my eyeballs worse than eczema on an itchy arsehole. We ticked off Tiananmen and The Forbidden City, but ditched plans for the Temple of Heaven as we couldn’t take it anymore. We got a taxi to Beijing train station and people watched until our departure time. Chinese people watching is easily the best thing you can do in Beijing and is my new favourite hobby.

We made our train to Shanghai, which I was a little worried about as Drew and I have a history of missing trains having missed one to Ulsan as we went drinking the night before. That bloody tequila again.

I was happy to spend time with drew in Beijing but I can't help but feel that he didn't see the places I had wanted him to. Our time in Beijing was much like the McGregor vs. Mayweather fight. We came out swinging in the first 3 rounds, but before long Beijing fought back and put us in our place. 

We cruised through the empty Chinese countryside at 307 km/h. Living in one of the most populated cities in the world it's pleasant to see a vast countryside, occasionally passing a city I've never heard of, which probably has a larger population than London. 

Four-and-a-half hours later and 1068 km behind us we arrived in Shanghai with just enough time to get to the AirBnB, drop our bags and head to the pub for the Liverpool vs. Arsenal.

The view from the AirBnB

I was very worried as our night could take a bad turn. If Arsenal lost heavily we knew we'd hit the tequilas pretty hard. 

Arsenal lost 4-0 and we hit the tequilas hard. 

The recovery was from the night before was much more successful. We had a food tour planned for this day, but as we hadn't eaten all morning and considering how much we drank the night before I was hoping Burger King was the first stop on the tour. Instead, it was a bull frog restaurant. 

“Swollen in head, weak in legs, sharp in tongue but empty in belly.”

- Mao Zedong

I was so hungry that I filled up on bull frogs, which is something I never thought I'd say. They were pretty good, but we had 8 more stops on the food tour and I was getting bloated. I was forcing down longevity noodles and crab cakes. It was not the hangover food I needed.

Top centre clockwise: some Chinese lad frying some pork cutlets, spicy bullfrog on rice, a crab cake pie, some dumplings, some flat bread, another dumpling, longevity noodles, some aged 50% alcohol. Hardly the best descriptions, I ate this stuff a few weeks back and didn't write down what we were eating.

We finished the tour and cracked a beer on The Bund. 

Another day in Shanghai and it was time to see the Propaganda Art Museum. It exhibits posters from the Maoist era of Revolutionary China. These images inspired millions of people to rise up and make their country into a global superpower. Before the age of widespread social media, this is how people were influenced.

Many depicted images of pro-Russian communism and painted images of anti-American capitalism. I laughed and pointed at the depiction of Americans in front of Drew until I saw a few posters mocking us Brits. That's not cool. 

The posters were fascinating. Take this image of the guys riding a fire breathing dragon. It doesn't inspire me much other than to go for some spicy noodles, but it built hopes of industry, agriculture, and toppling American imperialism. 

We got turnt that night. 

After forcing ourselves up for our final day at a reasonable hour we went to the old town and did the old sightseeing nonsense. 

We coordinated our outfits for this photoshoot.

The next morning Drew was up early to make his flight, he left while I was still in bed. Now I understand how whorish it feels to have a man walk out on you. I got the train home which felt like it took an eternity. When we got the train south it was easy. I was dreaming of cocaine and hookers, but on the way back I was nursing my damaged body and had laundry to do when I got home.

"Disaster and chaos are always good".

- Mao Zedong

It was a pleasure to spend some time with a good friend and hopefully, it’s not too long before I see him again wherever in the world that may be.

Tianjin: A Pleasant Escape from Beijing

The latest adventure has been to Tianjin, a city only 30 minutes from Beijing via the high-speed train. In order to get there it actually took Eunju and I 40 minutes to get to Beijing South Railway Station. Alas, despite the close proximity of the city it felt like I was travelling internationally as you must present your passport when purchasing a train ticket – just another way for the Chinese government to keep tabs on people and this causes some delay. We arrived in Tianjin in the early afternoon.

291 km/h to Tianjin

We didn’t really have any particular plans for Tianjin, it was just 2 days away to spend together as Eunju had just returned from a month in South Korea. We checked into out hotel to discover we were sharing the room with Susan. Susan is a fish that lives in the room who has a sign beside her tank which stated that Susan welcomed us. Now, I’d already proposed introducing another female to the bedroom to Eunju, it’s just that I was hoping she’d be human. We had the pressure of looking after Susan, which I didn’t expect or need. It would have been big news in Tianjin had something happened to her, I imagine the headlines reading; “Foreigners comes to Tianjin, kill fish.” We survived the weekend, as did Susan.

Out into the city and Tianjin has an extraordinary European feel to it. The city is clean, quaint, and walking around makes you think you could be in London, Barcelona, Milan or Paris. This comes from European establishment around the 1850s. In October 1856, Chinese soldiers boarded a British registered boat called the Arrow on suspicion of piracy, the Chinese imprisoned the 12 crew and removed the British flag. The British, rather peeved at this incident, then decided to then take control of the ports in Tianjin. 13,000 British and 7,000 French naval forces fought off the 200,000-strong Chinese army to claim the ports. The British then opened the city to foreign trade. Today you can see European architectural reminders.

History lesson over, Eunju and I first decided to head to Tianjin Water Park. Not a water park, but more a park with water. It was really nice, but far too hot. Walking in 37°C heat isn’t advisable. We took refuge, with ice creams, in a small pagoda-ish type building and watched the elderly dance. They can really move! More and more turned up with baiju (Chinese liquor) and beers and danced away. It was thoroughlu enjoyable.

Strictly no romping. Eunju was gutted.

Soon after we headed to Porcelain House – an entire mansion decorated in china. It looked rather strange from the outside. A French-design building used to be home to a finance minister, then converted into a bank, now a strange museum. We paid our ¥50 (£5.50) to look inside and that was a waste of money. The inside has antiques stacked high with absolutely nothing of interest to see. While the outside intrigues the inside has a feel more like a furniture store. Save your money and look at it from the street.

We meandered around the city and along the river. The river side is a really beautiful place with old European and Chinese buildings in between the new sky rises of modern China. The river is also very clean, much cleaner than Beijing tap water anyway. The elderly people of Tianjin are very active, when they’re not dancing they’re swimming in the river. 

The people in Tianjin seem much more relaxed, nicer and happier. You sometimes forget that you’re in China. Just when you’re enjoying life you get an unpleasant reminder of someone hocking up phlegm. Yep, still in China. 

The following day, we got up late, ate some spicy Sichuan food and took a ride on the Tianjin Eye, a Ferris wheel which stretches across the river. It seemed like a good idea until we go inside the cabins. The glass intensifies the heat making it feel like an oven. The view was nice, but it wasn’t worth melting for half an hour.

Sichuan food is known for being spicier than spicy!

We got the train back to dirty Beijing. Tianjin doesn’t offer much in the form of sightseeing, but it was a welcome break from Beijing and I’ll have a favourable memory of Tianjin. 

Six Months in China

The 9^th of July marks 6 months in China for me and I’ve learned a few things about this bizarre country, culture and people. China is much like an orgy – there are too many people and it’s awkward when they stare at you, but the money’s good…for teaching not orgy participation. I don’t charge for the orgies.

Live Like a Chinaman

From my experience of living in Beijing, there seems to be very little concern for your fellow man. It’s a city filled with very selfish individuals all with the attitude “this is what I’m doing, deal with it”.

Sometimes it’s when drivers stop their car on a crossing making everyone walk around them, or smoking anywhere they want - inside or out - despite the no smoking signs, or spitting every 15 metres, or being my neighbour whose hobby is drilling every morning at 7am, or the lack of respect everyone has regarding personal space, or any number of bad habits locals have.

Another example of a Beijinger who doesn't care

It took a while to adjust to this way of life and it was causing my blood pressure to rise each day, but once you accept and act like a local life is much easier. Although, it’s something that I hope I leave behind when I move on from China.

A City of Blinking Lights

Chinese people love their neon lights, you’ve only got to walk around the city to see their admiration for a bit of neon or LED, but not so much when it comes to the cars.

Every car in the country is fitted with flashing lights on each corner, these are known as indicators and I’m sure as soon as one of the locals discovers how to use them they’ll soon catch on. Until then though, they’ll continue to switch lanes with their “fuck it, this is what I’m doing” attitude. Why use mirrors and indicators when you can save time by just drifting lanes as and when you please?

Feeling Like a Model

Despite a significant amount of moaning thus far I have a lot more self-confidence living in China. I think Brits don’t tend to give and receive compliments all that well. There is always an air of scepticism, suspicion or sarcasm with a compliment, but here in China I receive a lot of flattering remarks each day.

The most common one I receive is “you look like Chris Evans”. That’s very flattering…unless they mean the ginger Radio Two presenter then it’s just cruel.

Hollywood stunner or 51-year-old ginger? I'm still not sure who they mean.

I’ll take the positivity while I can get it as the last compliment I received prior to China was way back in October 2016 when I was in Thailand. I was sharing a bottle of rum on a beach with a girl from Ireland. She made it very clear that she had a boyfriend and that nothing was going to happen between us, I understood and was slightly relieved as she was hardly my type. After a significant measure of rum had been consumed came the compliment, she said “you’re not such a bad guy, Brendan, and if I weren’t taken we’d be doing it in those bushes by now.” Feeling pretty chuffed, she then continued “but given how much I’ve drunk I’d probably shag that dog too.” 

Still, you accept the compliments as and when they come.

The Chinese Revolution of Fashion

I’ve seen China in the winter and the summer and the fashions choices are none that I’ve really seen in western countries. They love an Arsene Wenger coat in the winter and in the summer clothing seems optional.

In the summer temperatures can soar to 40°C, so it’s totally reasonable to not wear a shirt or if you have a little more dignity to opt for the Beijing Bikini. For those not in the know a Beijing Bikini is when you pull your shirt up without a care in the world, but what I love even more than seeing middle-aged men’s bare mid-drifts is when the men of China ditch the shirt completely but keep their executive shoes and trousers on just in case they have to rush to a business meeting.

Waste Not, Want Not

I’ve heard the saying “Chinese people will eat anything with legs, except a table”. They turn their noses up at nothing. Maybe it’s because I was raised in a western country where I had the option not to eat something that didn’t look or sound nice. I remember being at school and one of the dinner ladies telling me that I had to have vegetables with my lunch, so at about 6-years-old I managed to convince her to give me one pea. That’s a weak dinner lady to give in to the orders of a 6-year-old.

Going to try Peking Duck? Expect side dishes of duck brain and duck bone soup (they taste exactly as you would imagine). Going to the supermarket? Expect to see every part of the animal for sale that western dogs wouldn’t eat. Fancy a snack? Why not try insects or poultry bills or fermented eggs?

Clockwise: How you buy chicken in a supermarket, a nice duck bill snack, which will go well with chicken feet, a century egg preserved in clay for many months, a pigs trotter in the supermarket, and fried seahorses and scorpions.

I’m only scratching the surface to be honest, anything you can imagine that can be hunted will be served on a plate somewhere in China.

Labour Exploitation

This place is so bloody cheap. Is it wrong to exploit cheap labour? Definitely, but it’s hard to avoid. Manufacturing is what has built China in the past few decades, I’ve exploited it no more than anyone else in the world, but it’s a pleasant surprise when you get a bill here.

Any form of labour usually costs less than a cup of coffee. A taxi across the city costs around £4. A cleaner for 2 hours costs £7. A man with a van helped me move apartments and charged me £12.

I live a privileged life. These days I don’t cook, clean, or take public transport and moving to another country might take some adjusting for my spoilt arse.

I Shouldn’t Have Said That…

To look around this city it seems no different to any other major metropolitan in the world. There is freedom of movement, freedom of choice, a wide choice of food options with foreign restaurants ubiquitous. Despite officially being communist China seems as capitalist as the west, or so it seems.

It’s something that I still haven’t gotten used to having been born and raised in Britain. I grew up in a country that allows true freedom and I find it bizarre that certain things are just accepted and other things are unquestionable.

A slip of the tongue can cause quite an earache here. I once referred to Hong Kong as a country to my students and they all shot me down. Stern faced they stopped me mid-sentence to say “Hong Kong is not a country.” Tensions are pretty high about that topic currently, so I keep my nose out.

I was feeling a little quizzical and was asking my co-workers about life in China asking question after question, which they seemed happy enough to answer. At what age do most people get married? How old do you have to be to drink? How old do you have to be to vote? A long pause followed that question, then I realised what I had said. People fought and died for their right to vote in Britain, but here it’s accepted that they don’t have that right. And whatever you do, don’t criticise China. China is number 1!

I’m currently experiencing modern day China, but I don’t know much about China’s past. That’s why I’m reading up on it. Always learning. I’m currently working my way through John Farman's Ancient China.

Yes, that’s a children’s book. I’m not doing a masters in Chinese history, I just want the basic facts delivered in a fun and informative way. I am reading adult books too, I’m not a complete imbecile, it’s just ancient history can be difficult to take in.

The Easy Life. Sort of.

A huge benefit of living in other countries is you get to see how other people tackle normal day-to-day things. My eyes have been opened to new, revolutionary ideas that make everyday tasks that little bit easier.

WeChat is the Chinese WhatsApp and everyone uses it.  This one app is used for everything, aside from the main function of communication it’s used for paying bills, booking hotels, booking cinema tickets, maps and navigation, ordering taxis, pretty much anything.

You don’t need bank cards and cash anymore.

Shopping has been made easier too. Using websites such as Jing Dong or Tao Bao, you can get great deals and SAME day delivery, no 3-5 day delivery times here.

While some things have been made so simple other aspects of life seem to have gone back in time. The visa process is unbelievable, 3 months of applications, interviews, more applications, signatures, approvals just to get a temporary visa, then to do it again to get the long-term one.

Renting an apartment is terribly annoying too. After you’ve gone house hunting you need to stump up three months’ rent, one month deposit, an agency fee, maintenance fees, it’s an expensive process! Quarterly rent payments are the norm which is another thing I had to learn.

The last six months has flown by and I’m sure the next six will too. Who knows what the future holds after that.

Until next time.

Longqing Gorge

Situated north of Beijing Longqing Gorge offers refuge for those tired of living in the polluted capital. Eunju and I had been planning on going for some time and had calculated the route there expecting it to take up around 2 hours by bus.

When I awoke that morning I felt rather uneasy with a minor stomachache. It wasn’t going to scupper my plans for the day and thought I’d be able to shake it off once I had a coffee inside me.

We boarded bus 919 and followed our progress on the map. We started to notice that the journey was taking much longer than anticipated, then we realised that we weren’t on the express bus. We were on the slow bus going around the houses. This very disappointing turn of events twinned with my stomach becoming more uncomfortable made for a disappointing morning. Three-and-a-half hours later we arrived.

We got off the bus in Yanqing and got a taxi to the gorge. The roads were empty – something I hadn’t seen since arriving in China. There was quite literally no one around which made it exquisitely peaceful. Then the taxi driver stopped and said that he couldn’t take us any further. Luckily we didn’t have to walk the remaining distance up the mountain roads as a man on a motorbike said he’d take us the rest of the way for ¥10 (about £1), a very fair and reasonable price to be propelled from a motorbike without any safety gear. Recent weather had been very hot, but this wasn’t the case in Yanqing. It was surprisingly chilly and by the time we’d gotten to the gorge on the back of the bike I was freezing. I was seriously considering buying a scarf, which seemed mad considering temperatures had reached 38°C only a few days before.

We had finally made it to the gorge. We took an escalator up the mountain, which I now think is definitely preferable to walking up.

We got aboard the boat that would take us along the snaking Gucheng River between the beautiful rocks. The scenery was truly magnificent, and the tour guide explained the history of the local area, or so Eunju told me anyway.

Further down the river and we were off the boat. At this pit stop were many exciting things that I was not in the mood for.

There were opportunities to go kayaking through the gorge, bungee jump off the top of one, or relax in a Buddhist temple. One way they tried to persuade people to do such adrenaline fuelled idiocies was to play very loud techno music. I suppose the logic is to play up beat music to get your blood pumping, and excited to make a mistake such as jumping off a 50m gorge with shoddy Chinese equipment. It didn’t quite have that effect on me.

Instead my stomach had just about given up and I was bordering on vomiting. Between the boat ride, the loud awful techno music, and the smell of burning incense from the nearby temple I was fully expecting to see the remains of my last meal. I was feeling terrible and was 4-5 hours away from the sanctuary of my bed. I wandered through the temple grounds and started to wonder if there would be anything more disrespectful than vomiting on a Buddhist monument. I managed to hold it together.

There was nothing else to do but make the slog of a journey back to Beijing feeling nauseous. I spent the rest of the day and the following morning between my toilet and my bed.

I was due back at work the following afternoon and got hit by a car on my commute to work. Not a bad accident, but enough of a hit to knock me off my bicycle.

It was not a good few days in the life of Brendan Fennell.